News 21/11/2025 10:33

Spencer Matthews says 'I knew I'd lose her' as he address Vogue Williams' 'struggles'

Spencer Matthews Opens Up on Alcohol Battle and Marriage with Vogue Williams

Spencer Matthews has candidly revealed how his struggle with alcohol addiction brought him to a crossroads—one where he feared he would lose his wife, Vogue Williams—if he didn’t take control of his drinking. The former Made in Chelsea star has spoken publicly for the first time about how he went from downing ten pints a night as a City trader to transforming his life, and how his wife’s loyalty and his own resolve helped turn things around.

Matthews recalled that during his heavy-drinking days he would often head out with clients after consuming large amounts of alcohol. At one particularly low point, he found himself alone while Vogue was away filming, drinking a bottle of whiskey and calling friends to try and salvage the night. “I felt like a f*****g loser,” he said on the podcast Happy Place hosted by Fearne Cotton. “I was on my own, Vogue was away … I just felt like I could have died from it.” 

In a separate interview, Matthews described himself as a “hedonist” who drank daily from about the age of 15 until his late twenties. He admitted to downing a shot of tequila as early as 9am, and acknowledged that his behaviour had become “almost aggressive” toward his wife. 
Vogue Williams and Spencer Matthews
Spencer Matthews feared losing Vogue Williams while battling alcoholism(BAFTA via Getty Images)

Life-Changing Decisions

The turning point came when Matthews realised the seriousness of his drinking. He said he “could have died” from his alcohol habit, and that the impact on his marriage made him recognise he had to change. Vogue Williams has publicly acknowledged how her husband’s sobriety influenced her own decisions around drinking. 

As part of his recovery and transformation, Matthews set himself an extraordinary athletic challenge—running 30 marathons in 30 days across the Jordanian desert. He credits this extreme physical endeavour with helping him reclaim his life, his health and his relationship. The Scottish Sun

He also founded the non-alcoholic spirits company CleanCo, which he says reflects his desire to lead a “life less wasted” and offer alternatives for people who want sophisticated drinks without the alcohol. The Times+1

Marriage, Fatherhood and Mid-Life Reflection

Matthews and Williams married in June 2018 at his family’s estate in Scotland. They share three children and have both spoken openly about how parenthood, partnership and personal growth feed into their relationship. Matthews admits that though his plate is full—with business, fitness challenges and media commitments—he is deeply committed to protecting his family and mental health.

Williams has described how she struggles to relax, even when she has downtime, and how she deals with “mum guilt” and the urge to always be productive. Matthews notes their shared ambition but also emphasises how vital communication and mutual respect have been in their marriage.
The pair's children will be at home
Spencer and Vogue share three children together

Why It Matters

Their story resonates because it illustrates a shift—from reckless excess to self-awareness, from partying culture to purpose-driven living. Matthews’s honesty about the dark side of success, the fragility of relationships under strain, and the power of change makes his journey more than tabloid fare: it becomes a reflection on modern masculinity, vulnerability and redemption.

As Matthews put it: “I love life as an experience … and there are moments where you feel like a loser and you feel s*** about your behaviour.” That admission, far from undermining him, helps humanise someone often seen through the lens of celebrity. His decision to act—and to act publicly—shows that even the seemingly untouchable can falter, and can also rebuild.

Whether through CleanCo, his endurance challenges, or the quiet, resilient work of being a husband and father, Spencer Matthews appears to have redirected his past into something constructive. And in doing so, his marriage to Vogue Williams becomes one of shared survival and growth rather than simply a celebrity romance.


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